Like Steve McQueen in Bullitt, or the Great Escape.
Like Lightning McQueen in Cars 1, 2, or 3.
Or like Seabiscuit running circles around the competition in Seabiscuit.
I am on fire and flying fast tonight … and I don’t hate it. It’s been a damn good day for me personally and for me in all aspects of my life and it just has my mind racing. I haven’t felt this way in a while – being so charged up like this, and feeling like my mind is moving so fast that things around me are almost slowing down. I am staying indoors and close to my wife though – that’s how I know I’ll be ok no matter how fast I may feel that I’m going tonight.
Here’s the difference tonight in how I feel, versus how I felt back in March and April: I feel happy. While I recognize that it’s mania – I feel happy, and carefree, it’s happy. There’s no sign of self harm, no sign of darkness, or any of the other old clouds from back then. I am still on meds – haven’t come off of them yet – and still seeing my therapist twice a month. I’m here blogging, filling up all those Blank screens. I have been logging more time on my knees recently than in a long time and He is meeting me more than halfway. I can’t imagine trying to get through this in any way other than the one that involves the power of God working for me. There are few things in life more important to me than having a solid relationship with my Heavenly Father.
Tonight I feel like Usain Bolt is running laps in my brain, but at least he’s smiling 🙂